I pull away chuckling.I point to the kitchen knife I have laying on the nightstand. "You don't want me to use that do you?" Her eyes go even wider. "T...en behave Emily." I stroke her face again, and she lays there unmoving."Why are you doing this?" "I would say, "to teach you a lesson," but considering I'm no longer a teacher, I'll call it..payback. Think that sounds suitable, don't you?" I see tears start to stream down her face. "Oh don't cry Emily. You chose this, I'm only here to show you. Maybe I can work through that wall and maybe I can't --but I need to be able to see it to make an estimate..."Lois' shoulders slumped. "What do you want?" I know it sucks, but I need to see. I need to see the girl and I need to see that little spot that isn't girlish. I need to know what is there -- and whether I can deal with it when the time comes," Mike sighed. "If I can't, we can still be friends, if you want to -- but at least you'll know up- front that we're not going beyond that.". Mad that I reached to loosen my tie. Standing with my chin up. And realizing it, before you turn to smile at me, I lower it a smidgen. “Where were we?” you ask, all edginess gone from your voice, your bosom seemingly pressed a little against my bicep, as we turn to leave the scene. “You are very good with people,” I say from the side of my mouth, “what do you really do all day?” We laugh, and I go ahead and broach the subject myself, asking if you had had some dinner, had tried any of the hors. Almost.The one thing that I remember very clearly about her was that she always seemed bubbly and happy no matter the situation. I had a crush on her for the longest time growing up. She was only five feet tall, very dark brown hair that she always kept midway down her back. She had cut it to a little longer than shoulder length by the time of the Christmas visit I mentioned. Getting back in touch with her and getting to know her as an adult has been nice. I didn’t feel so alone.
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